Archive for the ‘dreams’ category

What is Confidence?

August 6, 2009
How would that extra confidence feel?

How would that extra confidence feel?

Confidence, we all talk about it, we all have it and we all generally would like more of at certain times in our lives, but what actually is it?

Quite simply, confidence is just a set of skills that can be learned by anyone to give them the feeling that they can succeed in any given situation or circumstance.  That’s Great News!  Why? Because it means that we can all learn to have more whenever we need it, it’s not genetic, it’s nothing to do with how much money we have, it’s nothing to do with upbringing, it’s not for a select group – it’s there for us all!!! Hooray!!

Very often we are confident in some areas of our lives and not others for example you might be confident at home with your family but not so confident in meetings with those above you at work, you might be confident in your job but not good at making friends easily, you may be confident with your friends but not in dealing with children.  In order to learn the skills we need it’s useful to identify which specific areas do you lack confidence and why and how would life be different if you had more confidence in this area? So go ahead and answer these questions for yourself right now.

What areas of my life do I lack confidence in?

Why?

How would it be different if I had more confidence in this area of my life?

Congratulations! You have just begun the process of being more confident by taking the first steps in identifying what can be improved and importantly why you want to improve it.  So for your chosen situation can you think of someone that you know or have seen who has the kind of confidence that you would like in that situation? Write down their name andCB022665 then list what you admire about them in that situation? How do they walk, stand, breathe, speak, what is their body language, what questions do they ask, what sort of words do they use? Imagine what it’s like to be them. If you have the opportunity, why not ask them? One of the best things to do to learn to be confident is to model someone who is already great at it. Ask them if they are always confident, chances are they feel a little nervous at times too, they just do it anyway and that’s the key. Confident people still feel a bit scared – they are just prepared to give it a go anyway.  That’s good news for the rest of us J We’ll look at some of the other ways to help us just do it anyway in future articles. For now, just take the actions above and you’re well on your way to a more confident you.

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Visualisation – Your Amazing Mind!

February 19, 2008


j0433055.jpg Your mind is an amazing, powerful and creative tool. With it you have an awesome capacity to change how you feel long-term by creating your future right now.

If you can imagine it, you can achieve it. If you can dream it, you can become it. – William A. Ward

You not only have the ability to remember events and re-run them in your mind, but you are also capable of creating events or feelings in your imagination before they actually occur. You do this all the time; when you are looking forward to a holiday you have booked or when you have planned a night out. You think about how it’s going to be and build up an expectation of how it will play out don’t you?

Athletes use this ability to practice their techniques and to run the races before they have even stepped out of the starting blocks. Golfers use it to practice their swing, musicians use it to practice their performances before the big day. The incredible thing is — and I love this – the mind can’t tell the difference between what is real and what is imagined visually.

Wow! How cool is that?! If you imagine your future vividly – it becomes your reality.

So if you want to feel fantastic, have tons of energy, be happy, successful and abundant in every good way, the secret is to start that process right now in your imagination. How?

Everyday set aside ten minutes each morning and ten minutes every night to do this. Sit quietly, close your eyes and let the process begin.

In your imagination see yourself as the person you would LOVE to become. Where are you? Who are you with? What are you doing? How does it feel? Breathe deeply and soak it all in. Now make the picture brighter, add more colour to it. What are you saying to yourself or others around you? Make the feelings stronger, feel the emotions you’re feeling more intensely. Smile as you see yourself being amazing, as you feel an incredible inner strength, joy and confidence! Now turn the sound up. Make the vision even more real!

As you experience the joy and passion of who you are, give thanks for it as if it has already happened, as if it is happening right now in this very moment. Celebrate the new you! Celebrate the moment and make it real. Do this over and over again, for all the ways you want to change, for all the new things you want to do, for all the new, powerful feelings you want to experience. Live the life you deserve the way you want to NOW and you will be well on your way to making it your reality!

 

To find out more about your amazing mind contact tracey.dowe@momentumpeople.co.uk or log in to http://www.momentumpeople.co.uk

How to create an Extraordinary Relationship

February 11, 2008

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1. Learn to love yourself.

You can’t give to other people what you haven’t learned to give yourself. How do you expect any one else to cherish you, love you and adore you when you do not treat yourself in this way?

All relationships start with YOU.

Write down 10 things that you love about being you.

Write down 10 of the wonderful qualities that you have.

Write down 10 things that you can do to show your appreciation for you.

2. Select the qualities you need in a relationship.

When looking for anything in life be it a person, and object, a job or a holiday you first have to decide EXACTLY what it is that you are looking for. Otherwise you will just drift, never knowing if you have found the right one or not. It’s no different when looking for your ideal partner.

How do we normally meet someone? In a bar or club, at work maybe or because they share a common interest? We just both happened to be in the same place and were both needing someone. You hit it off, have something in common and the chemistry kicks in. It’s a whirlwind of emotions, you get together…time goes by and when the chemistry fades you’re left wondering why you’re together.

By setting out our wants, needs and must-haves in a relationship in advance we run a much lesser risk of spending a long time with the wrong person. When the chemistry kicks in and common sense disappears at least you have a pre-defined list of what you want to compare this person with to know if they are really what you were looking for. It’s so important to set out what we absolutely must have (and absolutely must NOT!) in advance if we are truly to find the Mr or Miss Right for us.

  • Define your Ultimate Soulmate

Who is the man/lady of your dreams? What physical attributes do they have? What height are they? What weight? What colour hair and eyes? What age are they? What do they wear and look great in?

    What career do they have? What kind of income?

    What hobbies and interests do they have?

    Should they have kids? Should they want kids? Should they have none and want none??

    What characteristics do they have? Are they funny and witty? Intelligent? More intelligent than you or less intelligent than you? Do they like to keep fit or to relax a lot? Do they play sport or the PSP?

    Are they vegetarian or a red-blooded meat eater? Do they like to socialise or are they quiet shy and retiring? Are they extrovert or introvert? Life and soul of a party or a wall flower?

    Who is your ideal partner.

    Which of these is a MUST and which would be great to have?

      • Mate from hell!

        Normally I would not even go to the negatives but here, well, it is SO important to have this list to combat making a poor partner decision when the chemistry is raging. List below all of the attributes this person must no way have. What will you absolutely not stand for in a person or relationship?

        This one is probably easier than the first as we usually know what we don’t want better than what we do, so go on….make that list!

        For example:-

        I will absolutely NOT have a person who is abusive mentally or physically. No coach potatoes. No rudeness. No-one who is foul-mouthed. Etc.

        Your turn.

          • Define the Ultimate Relationship

            Describe now the relationship you will have with your ideal person. What will you do together? Where will you go? What goals will you share. What will people say about you as a couple. Write down everything about your ideal relationship.

            3. The final step

            So here it is, the final step in the journey to finding your ideal mate.

            No matter where you go and what you do to find this ideal mate your past relationships and your future ones all have one thing in common.

            You take YOU with you.

            So – in order to succeed in love….

            What kind of person would YOU have to be to attract your ideal mate?

            Like attracts like. That’s the basis of rapport and rapport gives us that deeper connection. You need to become the sort of person you would like to find. Describe the values, characteristics, conduct, and habits you would need in order to deserve the mate you just described.

            So, I hope that you have written down the answers to all of the questions above. When you commit to finding this ideal person and become the person you want to be with some ting magical happens and I know from my experience that this absolutely works.

            I wish you every success in finding true love and hope that you will share your experiences with us too.

            Love and Blessings

            Get in to Focus

            January 6, 2008

            j0399971.jpgWe go through life living each and every day and at the end of each day we decide if it was a good day or a bad day. We get part way through a day and some times it can change from a good day to a bad day or the other way round. Did you ever stop and consider what makes it a good or bad day? Was it the events of the day? Or was it how we felt that day? There are days, aren’t there, when things don’t go our way and yet we still feel great. Other days, things go great and yet we still feel lousy, or, worse than that, we fail to feel anything. Why is that? What makes you feel good or bad or nothing as you go through your day?

             

            Well, what you focus your thoughts and attention on at any moment in the day determines how you feel in that moment. And, how you feel emotionally will determine how alive you feel inside and how much energy you have. Think about it with me right now. How do you feel in this moment? Happy? Sad? Curious? Challenged? Write down what that feeling was.

             

            Now, write down what were you thinking about in the minutes leading up to that question? If you were feeling pretty happy, were you thinking about something that made you happy? If you were feeling curious, were you asking questions? If you were feeling frustrated, were you thinking about something that happened that was frustrating?  What do you think about on a regular basis? Are there things that you have a habit of thinking about over and over?  How does it make you feel?

             

            If you’ve been thinking about something really exciting, a new opportunity, something that you’re looking forward to, something you know is going to be fantastic then I can bet that you’re feeling pretty enthusiastic, excited and happy right now! And if you had to measure your energy level on a scale of 1 to 10, 1 being low, 10 being high, where’s your energy level now?  Between eight and ten at a guess.

             

            If you’ve been thinking about something you want to do but think you can’t because it’s too hard or it’s something that ‘only other people get to do’, or maybe thinking about things that have gone wrong for you how do you feel?  Pretty down, deflated, low, sad or upset? What’s your energy like now on a scale of 1 – 10? A two or three maybe?

             

            You see, what you focus on i.e. what you think about most, is what you feel. What you feel determines your level of energy and how you see the world and how you see the world is your reality. If you focus on something being hard then life feels hard. Your reality is that life is a struggle; it saps your energy leaving you sad, tired and depressed. If on the other hand your focus is on the good things in life, if you’re optimistic and cheerful then your reality is very different isn’t it? You have a smile. You have more energy. You have a bounce in your walk – a spring in your step. Life feels good!

             

            Your energy and passion for life are totally dependent up on what you think about each minute of each day and what your state of mind is like in each moment.

             

            Let me ask you a question. Do you notice what you think about? When you’re feeling low or frustrated, when you’re in a negative frame of mind — do you relate it to what you’re thinking about? In turn, when you are feeling tired, down or sad — did you notice what you’d been thinking about to be in that place? Your feelings are absolutely the key to having energy, passion and purpose in your life! They are dictated by our thoughts and our thoughts ultimately dictate our reality. So what you focus on is what you feel. What you feel determines your reality and your reality determines how much energy you feel and can give out.

             

            I LOVE the passion and energy that I have in my life. I praise my God for it every day! It is awesome to wake up raring to go every morning. It feels incredible to have a big smile on my face all the time and to bounce through my days with such excitement and enthusiasm. It rocks! I want YOU to feel this way too! Why do I have it? Because I DECIDED to have it.

             

            I spent so long in a bad frame of mind and suddenly, one day I realised I was low because I was feeling sorry for myself. I had no energy because I felt low. In that moment I DECIDED No more! I would never again allow myself to feel that way.

            I was in charge and I was deciding that the new me was Alive and Loving it.

            I jumped out of my chair, punched the air and shouted – This is NOT who I am! I’m alive and loving it! I have ENERGY and PASSION!  Wuhooooo! I can be me!!

             

             

            You have to change your focus to change your feelings.

             

             

            Did you spot what I did there? I noticed that my feelings were linked to my thoughts. I felt low because I was thinking about how life sucked and how lonely I felt and how unfair it all was! As soon as I realised that I also realised that what I focus on, i.e. what I think about is up to me. It’s my mind and I have control over it. I call the shots!  It’s up to me to choose to think about something else if what I’m thinking about is making me feel bad. So I DECIDED that was not me. I changed my focus to who I wanted to be. I thought about what I could be. I caught a glimpse of that person and it FELT good to be her and I liked it! I suddenly leapt out of my chair because as my thoughts changed my energy level also changed and I wanted to move, shout and jump around to celebrate the new me! So you see – by changing your focus, i.e. what you’re thinking about, you can instantly change how you feel in your emotion and your energy.

             

            The thoughts we choose to think are the tools we use to paint the canvass of our lives

             

            Think about good things and you will feel good. Try it! Now think about a time in your life when you were truly happy. Everything was just right and you felt fantastic! Think about it, see it now. How do you feel right now? Happy? We can instantly go to memories and events from our past to change our mood.

             

            Another way to change your focus would be to think about something completely different. Switch your thoughts to what’s going on around you. What’s happening outside? Listen to the background music. Notice the flowers in the garden or the birds singing in the tree outside. Take your mind off yourself for a while and see how different it makes you feel. One of the best things you can do if you’re feeling sad, lonely or frustrated is to forget yourself and go do something for someone else. Go give something. Go speak to someone or go ask if you can help in any way. You will notice a major change in how you feel. Giving to others always brings you a reward of satisfaction and joy.

             

            So the next time you feel bored, lonely, sad, frustrated, tired DECIDE to think of something else. Notice what you’re thinking about and go DO something. Then make a note of both so you can use it to change how you think and how you can celebrate your progress!

             

            Presenting on the Radio!?!

            December 13, 2007

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            Last week saw the start of a new adventure for me, I began a short course to learn how to present a radio show! The radio station will be Community Radio Swindon, a brand new radio station for the community by the community of Swindon and will launch on the 14th January 2008. Great excitement!!…..and more program presenters needed!!

            So last week, my 1st week on the course was really just an introduction to programming and a play with the equipment. I learned what a play out system was and how to use it. Which faders went to which and microphone and when to use them. How to listen to one track whilst playing another on air and all of that good stuff! We discussed what went into a radio program, the content and how the time is filled. My homework is to put together a running order for a half hour show to go out on a week day morning.

            Introduction to yourself and the program

            What music would you play?

            Would you have a guest?

            Will there be a phone in? and if so what about?

            Is there news or a headline preview?

            Time checks

            Traffic reports

            What’s on locally?

            So – here’s my plan for a half hour show……

            Good morning and welcome to Community Radio Swindon this wonderful Wednesday morning. I’m Tracey Dowe, TeeJay to my friends….and I hope I can call you all my friends…so TeeJay to you too…….and I’m with you until 11.30 this morning. It ‘s the New Year and a new show and like you I’ve started both with all good intentions. It’s a time to make resolutions, decide on our goals for the year, plan what we want to do, where we want to be and for some of us…deeper than that…..to plan who we want to become. Today we’re going to chat about how to give your self the best possible start to the New Year and how to turn those resolutions into actions and Results!

            But first let’s play a little music……as last years is now history and we plan for the new one ….Queen…Another on bites the dust!(4mins)


            Great record isn’t it?! Another one bites the dust! And didn’t last year fly by? They just seem to get quicker and quicker don’t they? So 2007 is now history and it’s time to decide how to be great in 2008! In a moment or two we’re going to open up the phone lines and find out just what your NY resolutions are and how you plan on achieving them…..so get dialling and let us know by calling 01793 xxxxxx now!

            (Next record) Let’s hear what magic you’re going to create for yourself this year…..

            “You can do magic – America (3 min 55)

            Take a few calls – 5 mins

            Record How to be a millionaire – ABC (3min 40)

            More calls 5 mins

            Record – Life will never be the same – Haddaway (3.40)

            Fantastic record, brings back some powerful memories! Thanks to all of our phone in listeners for sharing their dreams with us and we wish them every success too. Stay tuned in the coming weeks for more on how to dream, set goals and more importantly how to make them happen!

            Next up on air with you is the lovely xxxxxxx…….

            I leave you with Stevie Winwood…finer things…have a great day!!!


            So…that was my home work. I hope to turn it into a reality on air in the New Year on a longer than 30 mins show so that I can actually lead listeners through a goals setting workshop on air – that would be so cool!

            Let me know what you think!!!

            4th September 2007

            October 11, 2007

            j0405480.jpgThe Black Bag at breakfast this morning in Street went down extremely well! Certainly stimulated much thought and resulted in two very interesting conversations – one with a leadership coach and one with a homeopath.

            At the meetings you get 60 seconds to introduce yourself and what you do – what kind of referrals you’re looking for etc. I always find it SO hard to put in to words exactly what it is we do. This morning on the way in I was pondering this very thing and decided to ask my unconscious mind “Unconscious mind can you answer this question? What can I say in 60 seconds that will best describe my business?


            Within 1 minute my unconscious mind answered me.

            This morning rather than attempt to describe what I do in 60 seconds, I told a story 🙂

            There was once a young boy, when he was still small his parents gave him a rucksack and as he went through life with every negative event, hurt and disappointment he marked the occasion by picking up a stone and putting it in his rucksack. As life went by and he kept adding stones he got to a point where the sack was so heavy that it weighed him down. He felt so tired that one day he felt the couldn’t go on any more and he sat down under a tree to think about giving up. He gave his coach a call and they had a chat. And after a little while the man took off the rucksack, left it there under the tree. He leapt to his feet – a man with a plan, a Passion, a PURPOSE! He walked off into his new life and never looked back”

            Hmmmm…..some thing to think about!

            After the meeting I went to a local pharmacy to complete some medicines use reviews with customers for them. I had some amazing conversations. Two ladies in particular were so lovely. One lady suffered from chronic migraine attacks – she said she had tried everything. We spoke about illness being due to emotions and talked about what I did outside of pharmacy. It was not appropriate for me to take her through parts integration or temporal dynamics there, however she asked for my number and will be in touch.
            The other lady was a remarkable 79 year old who having got divorced 14 yrs ago had found her true self and was living life anew and to the full. She was full of energy and life and again very interested in what we do.

            This evening when I got home my new silver pendulum had arrived so we got the pendulum script out and had a little practice – my daughter thought it was amazing!

            3rd September 2007

            October 11, 2007

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            Lovely to hear from Brian by email this morning – happily sent my anchoring stuff – the offer’s still there for anyone who would like it too. 🙂

            Had a call from a lady from the Noah’s Ark Trust – they’re running a volunteer training weekend this weekend and she knew it was late notice but would I be able to do a presentation for them on Sunday?

            Of Course! 🙂

            My subject is “How to protect yourself emotionally”…..when working with bereaved children. How not to get emotionally involved and take it home with you.

            I had a few thoughts that I sounded a few people out about and Alistair bless him gave me a call with some fantastic ideas around using identity and archetypes. The support from this group is amazing – I really appreciate that people have just emailed away or picked up the phone and shared so freely. It is a truly outstanding community to be in.

            So – I’m working on my presentation and have nearly got it together and I’m already really excited about taking it there and delivering it. I’m just pondering some music for it. It’s great fun!
            I got the opportunity to talk a little bit to this lady a bout time line therapy/temporal dynamics with these kids – about how it will preserve the memory, and that they can take the positive learnings from the experiences and move on without the painful emotions. She was very interested so I’ve arranged to explore this some more with her on Sunday.

            That was the reason for my post in the NLP etc forum here – I really would like to use the gift that we have to support these kids as much has I can. And – I have to say a BIG thank you not only to Alistair for calling me today – but to Mark too. Mark saw my post about TL in kids and called me this evening to share his experiences. So much really valuable information! I have taken so many notes from people today!! Thank you SO much!

            I am still SO excited about getting this stuff out there and sharing the gifts with as many people as I can – I get really frustrated with myself if I feel I’m not making progress! It’s a great motivator! We are so privileged to have learned it that I just have to use it and teach – every day.

            The black bag is making it’s debut appearance tomorrow morning in Street in Somerset 🙂 I’m having lots of fun using this and will be doing it a lot more over the next few weeks too.

            Life is so AMAZING! Loving it!